Thursday, September 10, 2020

God's take on divorce

A common teaching is that you're living in adultery if you get divorced and marry someone who's divorced.

Preacher Richard Jordan addressed this last Sunday evening in his current Q&A studies. "When I read this letter that came in from someone on the East Coast about this, it was a very troubling kind of a question because you can almost hear the pain in the heart of the person, who did not give his/her name," he relayed.

"The reason people think divorce is an unpardonable sin is a misunderstanding of Matthew 19. Also, in I Corinthians 7, there's no justification for divorce for any reason and that's a very clear statement under grace.

"This is a topic that if you don't study it dispensationally, and you think there's only one rule for everybody in every age, you're going to wind up in real confusion and distress, just like with this letter writer.

"Paul writes in I Corinthians 7: [13] And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
[14] For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
[15] But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.

"That's the goal; it's peace in the home. So if an unbelieving spouse departs, the Believer can let them go and they're not under bondage. The marriage is over and you're not bound by any obligations beyond that.

"Verse 27: [27] Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife.

"You see how it's a passive voice--this is what was done to you. You didn't seek the divorce but they left; they deserted.

"Verse 28: [28] But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.

"You see that? That's grace. The conditions are, you didn't want the marriage to be over with, you were willing to learn grace, apply grace, live grace. But your spouse wouldn't.

"When you're loosed that way, then you're free. Somebody says, 'Well, Brother Rick, what happens when that wasn't there?' Because sometime it's way after all this happens that you realize what you should have done.

"The fact is divorce is not an unpardonable sin. When you find yourself in sin and rebellion and willful, neglectful rebellion against God's Word, and you come to yourself, how do you deal with sin?

"I call it rebounding. You keep going. You repent. That's what II Corinthians 7 says. Godly sorrow works repentance when you look at it and say, 'I did this, it was wrong, I shouldn't have done it,' and you acknowledge your sin, not pointing at anybody else. I point at myself.

"When you acknowledge your failure, godly sorrow changes your mind and then you go and seek to set things right as best you can. II Corinthians 7 gives you a whole list of things that constitute a clearing, getting them out of yourself, changing your mind completely and thoroughly. Then you seek to live a life of grace that demonstrates that transforming behavior.

"Marriage is not a spiritual imparting. That's the religious idea. It's a sacrament that imparts a spiritual connection. That's when you read this stuff about, 'Am I still married in the eyes of God?' The way God looks at is on the pages of His Word.

"Marriage is a physical union. God says, 'I'm going to make a help meet for him.' He takes a rib out of Adam's side and makes the woman. He puts their two hands together and says they're going to be one.

"You get an emotional connection, I understand, but that's still physical. There's no spiritual infusion of one person into another. So when marriage fails, when one party leaves, it scars you.

"Probably the most devastating failure in the life of a couple, of a person, would be to fail at that No. 1 obligation you take on in marriage. When it happens you carry the scar of that, the hurt of that, and you'll carry it forever.

"But what you do as a Believer when you fail is you say, 'That's the sin that Jesus Christ died to pay for and that's the sin He died to put out of my life. I may not be able to go back and reconstruct what life would have been had I not made that failure . . .'

"I've used this illustration forever: If you go out and get drunk and get your arm cut off in a car wreck, you can get a new car but you're never going to grow a new arm. Sin has consequences, even for Believers. But you can go on and live life with that severed arm. You can go on with correct behavior. You can live beyond the failure as a happy, productive Believer. It takes time. There's some things you'll never be able to do again but you can be productive.

"Paul ends the chapter with, [39] The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.
[40] But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God.

"That's the standard: one man, one woman 'til death do us part. Treat yourself and your spouse the way God treats you. You can live beyond it (and divorce) and be a happy and productive Believer and you don't have to have a stigma over your life because God's grace provides victory in every situation."

*****

"Paul says in Philippians 1, [9] And this I pray, that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in all judgment;
[10] That ye may approve things that are excellent; that ye may be sincere and without offence till the day of Christ;

"Notice he's praying for their love. But the love is not l-u-v. It's not a warm, wonderful feeling for everybody. This is not an emotional, circumstantial-based love because it's going to increase in knowledge. This is a thinking, knowledge-based love. The idea of loving something is valuing and esteeming it. Paul's saying that he's praying your ability to value and esteem a thing would grow in knowledge and judgment (the idea being discernment).

"Verse 10 means, 'I want you right now to have your ability to value and esteem life (others, circumstances) based upon knowing some things in God's Word about who you are and what God's doing that gives you the ability to discern what goes on.' "

(new article later TODAY)

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