The friends and family plan

“You don’t need me to be happy.” This is the politically correct way to live today. Everybody accountable for themselves. Only show unconditional love to family members. Tough love for a lot. Performance system for the masses. Forget the security blanket of times past when a tribe diligently monitored its members. I am learning my own great weaknesses in these areas.

I had a “best friend” who died very unexpectedly almost two years ago. I frequently fall into self-pity, thinking, “Oh, what a void. He really, truly loved me and was always there for me. I could talk to him about anything and he got me. He knew my personality and he understood me.”

I really believe he was a true friend who loved me as much as he knew how, but he was unsaved. None of anything I tried to get through to him took—or at least that’s what I’ve concluded when I contemplate him being in hell. For me, he was the first person I really loved and counted on who died on me as an unsaved person. It is a real process to go through--one that you don't know 'til you're in it and really living it out.

The best thing I can say about my friend is he kept me alive as a writer. He was the only one! Nobody else even said a word! But the big thing is he really BELIEVED in my talent as a writer (as much as he wasn't necessarily a fan of what I was writing about).

If not for him, I never would have continued (starting back in 1997) and that’s the bottom line! I OWE it to him to still be a writer if not for anyone else. If not for him, I would have never even thought to apply for my magazine job in NYC, let alone survive it!

He played a crucial role in my decision to quit that job and write about the Bible. For my life he was worth all the back and forth about his salvation and whether or not the Bible was the Word of God. Thank you, Jack, and I say that to the dead lost person who (by adoption shortly after birth) was the cousin of Rahm Emanuel, currently running for mayor of Chicago. God bless all the unsaved people in my life (even to this day!) who keep me going.